Parental alienation (PA) is a strategy one parent uses to brainwash, manipulate, or program a child to reject or resist contact with the other parent.  Dr. William Bernet states in “Parental alienation:  Science and law”, ‘parents who program or brainwash their children virtually always blame others for problems, issues and circumstances that arise.’

             There is much damage done to children affected by parental alienation.  PA is a factor that a court can look to, and it can influence a court’s decision on child custody and parenting time orders especially in light of the fact that the trend in the law and court’s recent decisions regarding custody emphasizes that the custodial parent must foster the relationship with the other parent. 

 PA has been described in some court decisions and in some psychological treatises as paramount to psychological abuse of a child.  There are a number of fallacies about parental alienation as listed in a recent family law magazine entitled,” Parental Alienation, What Family Lawyers Need to Know. page 35 “ 

This a list of the common misconceptions about Parental Alienation:

            1.         Parental alienation theory assumes that just because a child is rejecting a parent it must be due to alienation.  Such is not the case.  If there is a legitimate reason for rejection, such as domestic abuse, corporal punishment or sexual abuse, PA is not the reason.

            2.         PA is a legal dissent used by abusive fathers in court.  PA is a medical condition that favors no specific gender.  All genders are likely to be alienated parent and indeed have found by court to have done so where PA was present.

            3.         PA should not be recognized because it will be misused by abusers.  For any type of abuse, there is always a risk of abusers pretending to be victims.  This risk creates the need for clear standards and reliable screening assessment tools to prevent misuse.

            4.         PA is unscientific.  This is a false claim.  Clinical, legal and scientific evidence on PA has accumulated for over 35 years.  

            5.         PA is short-lived response to the parents’ divorce.  Although this may be true in some cases, the effects of PA can last for years, and it can destroy a relationship between a parent and child and greatly affect the relationships of the children in the future. 

 Be wary of parental alienation. If there is a trend or pattern you notice whereby your child is stating that they do not want to visit with you or see you; or you see the relationship is deteriorating through no fault of your own, you may want to consider counseling and seeking the advice of an attorney. Parental alienation must be stopped before it is irreversible.

We at the DePalo law firm know the importance of children having a relationship with both parents and how to ensure that for our clients.